They say that if you can’t talk, write

They say that if you can’t talk, then write but what if feel like no one is really listening regardless of whether it’s written or said.

I’ve got so much that I want to say but can’t write it so it makes sense to me or you.

I don’t need someone to fix me or tell me what to do, I just need someone to listen to me without judgement and stand beside me instead of me feeling like I’m standing alone all the time and that I am a burden on them.

Well, soooooo much as changed over the last 9 months but one thing that remains the same is my head and the feeling of loneliness. For someone who suffers crippling anxiety from feeling alone and unworthy of anyone’s love and attention, the last few weeks have been so hard.

Leaving a secure job with lots of people who were classed as close friends, was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do in years. I don’t know if I’ve made the right decision, my head is all over the place. I honestly feel like running away from it all but I’ve done it and I’ll pick up what pieces I need to from whatever happens from here.

I think over the last year. I’ve discovered who I can rely on, who I should take a step back from and who has never really been in my corner. I pulled back from most people around me, which I know doesn’t help with feeling lonely but it’s the only way I know how to protect ME!